A PHONE CALL WITH THE PRESIDENT

PMB: Hello Femi, how are you?

Me: Ah General, long time. I’m fine thanks, same ol, same ol here o. Nice to hear from you.

PMB: I know it’s been a while but governance isn’t easy, especially of Nigeria.

Me: Hmm, I can imagine……so to what do I owe this call?

PMB: Well I was wondering that the election campaign has started and I haven’t heard from you. Indeed I haven’t heard or read your political views in quite a while. You were very helpful to me in the last election campaign trail.

Me: Lol, well maybe it’s because things have changed.

PMB: Well, that was our mantra last time, let’s take it to the next level.

Me: Very funny General, but for me it’s like “the more things change the more they remain the same” to me…..

PMB: What are you trying to say Femi?

Me: To be honest General, I’m confused. You haven’t delivered as you promised.

PMB: Haba Femi, even you said it would take more than four years.

Me: True, but there have to be signs that we are progressing and some changes. However I look around and…….

PMB: My dear Femi, don’t be confused. You know the rot was deep before we came in. You know that corruption fights back. You know that I was poisoned and ill for a while. You know there was an economic recession. You know that oil prices fell. You know….

Me: Yes, yes, yes, I know all that General, but really those excuses can’t be all you have to offer after four years?

PMB: Well, we removed subsidy, we stabilised petrol prices and supply, we completed some railway tracks, we recovered some stolen funds, we closed some corruption channels, we erm, erm, we erm…. I will get some of my supporters to give you more below

Me: But General, these changes should be there for all to see and feel. Your impact should speak for itself and not through your supporters.

PMB: Hmm Femi, are you Atikulated? I really don’t believe you will swing that way.

Me: Hahaha, you know me well General. I definitely am not Atikulated. But I am wondering if it takes a corrupt man to run a corrupt system well….

PMB: Femi, you know that line of thinking is warped.

Me: Yup, which is why I’m not swinging that way.

PMB: So stay with us, let’s finish what we’ve started. Or are you casting a protest vote?

Me: Protest vote? I don’t think that means anything in this country. Also not ready to vote for anyone who didn’t know he wanted to be President of Nigeria this time last year. Na so e easy? Besides they don’t have enough spread. I doubt if they will gather any seats in the upper and lower chambers.

PMB: So you see, you have no choice. What exactly is your challenge with me?

Me: Well the deep nepotistic, tribalistic and religious sentiments are a concern. My biggest worry is Aisha’s damning comments about you being controlled by some people. Your age and health also make me wonder if you have what it takes to go another four years…..

PMB: Deep sigh…..Aisha belongs in the bedroom, you can’t take her seriously.

Me: Deeper sigh…..it’s comments like this that show you are out of touch. Her suggestions are a big negative for you. Did a bedroom tiff make her come up with those lies as you would have us believe?

PMB: I guess the world is changing Femi. I get so much negative press with twisted stories. I now know why Obasanjo didn’t read the newspapers.

Me: Well, Fashola must have read the papers with glee when he governed Lagos. Action speaks louder. The general narrative about you doesn’t look good.

PMB: I hear you Femi, another four years and you will see all our plans crystallising. We can’t afford to go back to the past. PDP is the past. We’ve been there before…

Me: Well, I’m not sure the present is different from the past or that the future with you holds any promise…… There isn’t much difference between the two major political parties

PMB: Aha! That is one of my points. Saraki and all those newPDP people disrupted our plans. Now that they’ve left we can focus!

Me: If you win, General, if you win. And then you will still need the majority in the senate and House of Reps. And you need to get rid of the cabal.

PMB: There is no cabal Femi!

Ok sir!

Both share a laugh 😄😃😅🙂

Me: It is well General, we will see how it plays out. To be honest, I can’t stick out my neck for you right now. Like Nigeria, I feel like I’m between the devil and the deep blue sea in this matter. We are living on a prayer that whichever direction the wind blows us, a miracle of some sort will make things work out for this country. I once promised myself that I will never regret not leaving like Andrew and co. I still have no regrets but I worry for the next generation.

PMB: I understand and respect your position Femi. I will let you meditate over this. I pray the Almighty Allah grants you and Nigerians wisdom in this matter. I pray His mercies and grace upon our Nation never cease.

Me: Amen General. Thank you General. Do have a good night and I wish you all the best.

PMB: You are welcome Femi, have a good night too. Please let me know when you make up your mind.

Me: I will sir……..

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